Minnesota @ (-8.5) Green Bay
Joe: GB. RELAX... Continuing the trend of terrible Thursday night games. Why stop now?
Mike: GB. Vikings going with the novel approach of playing with no QB or RB this week.
FINAL: Green Bay 42-10. At least the Browns didn't draft Christian Ponder. Although, she would have been involved.
Sunday Games
Cleveland @ (Pick'em) Tennessee
Joe: CLE. For the first time in years, a win is EXPECTED from this Browns team. That scares the holy crap out of me, but I think they'll do it.
Mike: CLE. I wouldn't go so far as using the word expected. Just weird to see them not dubbed an underdog. Browns win by 17. Yes. 17.
FINAL: Cleveland 29-28. The beginning of a run for the Browns or will it be back to the same next week vs the Steelers???
Chicago @ (-2.5) Carolina
Joe: CHI. I get the better team and points??
Mike: CAR. Bears are too inconsistent.
FINAL: Carolina 31-24. The Bears were the better team for 2.5 quarters then their inconsistency showed up.
St. Louis @ (-6.5) Philadelphia
Joe: PHI. After scoring ZERO points on offense last week, Philly gets back on track this week.
Mike: PHI. They'll put it together this week. McCoy is due for 3 TDs.
FINAL: Philadelphia 34-28. We were robbed on this one.
Atlanta @ (-3.5) New York Giants
Joe: NYG. The opposite is happening that I thought would in the preseason, Atlanta is getting worse while the Giants are getting better.
Mike: ATL. Somebody is toking the Glenmont Ganja. Giants are terrible.
FINAL: New York Giants 30-20. You were saying??
Tampa Bay @ (-10.5) New Orleans
Joe: TB. Now with Byrd out for the season for the Saints, their defense won't allow for any blowouts. Especially not against a team lead by the amazing Mike Glennon.
Mike: TB. The Saints are Marching to Mediocrity.
FINAL: New Orleans 37-31 OT. Jimmy Graham getting hurt was the only news I cared about from this game. Stupid fantasy.
Houston @ (-6.5) Dallas
Joe: HOU. The JJ Watt for MVP arguments continue as he alone keeps Houston close throughout the game. The new Romo closes it out late.
Mike: DAL. Agreed with J J Watt. Has it been since LT that a defensive pass rusher has been so dominant?
FINAL: Dallas 20-17 OT. Something bad has to coming for the Cowboys to even this winning weirdness out.
Buffalo @ (-6.5) Detroit
Joe: DET. I, for one, do not see this great impact Kyle Orton will be making for the Bills. Seems a little McCown-ish.
Mike: DET. As I think every week for the last four years, the Lions have the tools but they need to win games like these vs inferior opponents not from Cleveland.
FINAL: Buffalo 17-14. I'm beginning to hate Buffalo.
Baltimore @ (-3.5) Indianapolis
Joe: IND. Luck continues his MVP campaign. Steve Smith (Sr) comes back down to Earth or whatever planet he's from.
Mike: IND. You should have a Jr. just so you can be Joe Miller Senior.
FINAL: Indianapolis 20-13. This game was not this close.
Pittsburgh @ (+6.5) Jacksonville
Joe: JAX. Just another chance to pick against the team I hate. Bortles will light up their terrible D.
Mike: PIT. Never pick with your heart.
FINAL: Pittsburgh 17-9. A defensive touchdown saves the Steelers from more embarrassment.
Arizona @ (-7.5) Denver
Joe: DEN. The Broncos off of a bye going against Drew Stanton. I think Peyton Manning can give the points.
Mike: DEN. Seriously, this might end up 51-17.
FINAL: Denver 41-20. Close I guess. And Peyton gets the Raiders next week.
Kansas City @ (-4.5) San Francisco
Joe: SF. Not buying one bit the KC Monday night win. Alex Smith's homecoming will not go well.
Mike: KC. I'm doing it. I'm picking against SF because I like nobody from the organization.
FINAL: San Francisco 22-17. Vegas Knows....
New York Jets @ (-6.5) San Diego
Joe: SD. How are the Jets going to score?
Mike: SD. Who says they're gonna score?
FINAL: San Diego 31-0. One of our finest duel predictions ever.
Cincinnati @ (+2.5) New England
Joe: NE. No reason to think the Pats have any chance in this one. That's the reason they win.
Mike: CIN. The dynasty, over for ten years, is officially put in the ground this year.
FINAL: New England 43-17. This was an easy choice for anyone who knows anything.
Seattle @ (+7.5) Washington
Joe: WAS. Russell Wilson is 17-1 at home but only a .500 QB on the road. While this road record would be amazing for the Browns, it's merely average for a great team like Seattle. Washington keeps it close but another Cousins turnover seals the game late.
Mike: SEA. Redskins are a joke. Their name is offensive, their stadium has no personality, the owner is King of the Jerks, the city is filthy and their players suck. And they're still my favorite team of the NFC East.
FINAL: Seattle 27-17. I can tell you miss Washington.
Week 5 Results
Joe: 10-5
Mike: 9-6
FINAL: Green Bay 42-10. At least the Browns didn't draft Christian Ponder. Although, she would have been involved.
Sunday Games
Cleveland @ (Pick'em) Tennessee
Joe: CLE. For the first time in years, a win is EXPECTED from this Browns team. That scares the holy crap out of me, but I think they'll do it.
Mike: CLE. I wouldn't go so far as using the word expected. Just weird to see them not dubbed an underdog. Browns win by 17. Yes. 17.
FINAL: Cleveland 29-28. The beginning of a run for the Browns or will it be back to the same next week vs the Steelers???
Chicago @ (-2.5) Carolina
Mike: CAR. Bears are too inconsistent.
FINAL: Carolina 31-24. The Bears were the better team for 2.5 quarters then their inconsistency showed up.
St. Louis @ (-6.5) Philadelphia
FINAL: Philadelphia 34-28. We were robbed on this one.
Atlanta @ (-3.5) New York Giants
Joe: NYG. The opposite is happening that I thought would in the preseason, Atlanta is getting worse while the Giants are getting better.
FINAL: New York Giants 30-20. You were saying??
Tampa Bay @ (-10.5) New Orleans
Joe: TB. Now with Byrd out for the season for the Saints, their defense won't allow for any blowouts. Especially not against a team lead by the amazing Mike Glennon.
Mike: TB. The Saints are Marching to Mediocrity.
FINAL: New Orleans 37-31 OT. Jimmy Graham getting hurt was the only news I cared about from this game. Stupid fantasy.
Houston @ (-6.5) Dallas
Joe: HOU. The JJ Watt for MVP arguments continue as he alone keeps Houston close throughout the game. The new Romo closes it out late.
FINAL: Dallas 20-17 OT. Something bad has to coming for the Cowboys to even this winning weirdness out.
Buffalo @ (-6.5) Detroit
FINAL: Buffalo 17-14. I'm beginning to hate Buffalo.
Baltimore @ (-3.5) Indianapolis
Joe: IND. Luck continues his MVP campaign. Steve Smith (Sr) comes back down to Earth or whatever planet he's from.
Mike: IND. You should have a Jr. just so you can be Joe Miller Senior.
FINAL: Indianapolis 20-13. This game was not this close.
Pittsburgh @ (+6.5) Jacksonville
Mike: PIT. Never pick with your heart.
FINAL: Pittsburgh 17-9. A defensive touchdown saves the Steelers from more embarrassment.
Arizona @ (-7.5) Denver
Joe: DEN. The Broncos off of a bye going against Drew Stanton. I think Peyton Manning can give the points.
Mike: DEN. Seriously, this might end up 51-17.
FINAL: Denver 41-20. Close I guess. And Peyton gets the Raiders next week.
Kansas City @ (-4.5) San Francisco
Joe: SF. Not buying one bit the KC Monday night win. Alex Smith's homecoming will not go well.
FINAL: San Francisco 22-17. Vegas Knows....
New York Jets @ (-6.5) San Diego
Joe: SD. How are the Jets going to score?
Mike: SD. Who says they're gonna score?
FINAL: San Diego 31-0. One of our finest duel predictions ever.
Cincinnati @ (+2.5) New England
Joe: NE. No reason to think the Pats have any chance in this one. That's the reason they win.
FINAL: New England 43-17. This was an easy choice for anyone who knows anything.
Seattle @ (+7.5) Washington
Mike: SEA. Redskins are a joke. Their name is offensive, their stadium has no personality, the owner is King of the Jerks, the city is filthy and their players suck. And they're still my favorite team of the NFC East.
FINAL: Seattle 27-17. I can tell you miss Washington.
Week 5 Results
Joe: 10-5
Mike: 9-6
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